Hey ho everybody! It's me! Fake Sam. Lol. So I spouted a ton of crap over the years. Things like being a guy, getting married, having twin boys by my whore cousin, being real lol, oh and shit like this hear:
Then this happened (again) to my twitter account:
But since Jackie can't hack, I ain't worried.
Dear Psycho, my password is the phrase you used to refer to your cunt (stinky_ pinky).
Sincerely, me.
Then this happened:
Dear Jackie Overton,
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Sincerely,
Everyone on Twitter
Now "Sam" has stated on her dying blog that she has/will unleashed/unleash "the Lindz" and how everyone will be terrified. Unless she burps or farts in my presence, I am not terrified. I'm gonna double dog dare "the Lindz" to come at me bitch! I am delighted to see Jackie's meltdown. What a wack job! What ever will she do without her fake Sam Cooper? Who cares! Amirite?
So this was fun:
The moment I saw the legal document, I knew Jackie was too much of a pussy to keep her nasty posts about Mary up. I KNEW SHE WOULD DELETE IT AND, AS USUAL, I WAS RIGHT.
Me: #AlwaysWinning Jackie: #AlwaysAloser
How did I know she'd delete the posts? This:
Jackie Overton: you are a pussy! Why did you delete all those posts? Because you are afraid. Scared. Pussy. Idiot. I actually dared her to keep the posts up, she backed down because #pussy.
Now that the pussy bitch deleted her posts, I decided to call "Sam" for an interview. It went a little something like this:
Me: "May I speak to Samuel Jacob Cooper please"
Jackie: "This is ka ka kelsey williams"
Me: "Hi Kelsey, this is Agent Orange from the publication 'Catfish weekly'. Do you mind if we ask you a few questions?"
Jackie: *burps loudly and yells for Della*
Me: "Jackie, I know its you. Stop with all these games. Just tell me why you pretend to Sam aka the homosexual"
Jackie: "He isn't a homo! He's a 44 married dad of identical twin boys heston and alex ceo of sjcinvestic 66 banjo playing vegan catholic avid reedor author of Almost Astarlia'd and Almost Human'd. I own gas statchions. And hotels. And 16 construction paper companies in the nebraskas and kansas and east dakota and iowa and a few 'M' states which i cunt remember rite now...."
Me: "Seriously Jackie, you fucked up. The 'He" and "I" thing again. Seriously, what the fuck?"
Jackie (in a deep fake southern accent): "Yeah, um, this here is Sam. Why are you poking the bear? The Lindz will hack you if you call here again."
Me: "Jackie, I actually gave you my password and you still can't hack me. Are you dyslexic or something?"
Jackie ( in her 'The lindz" voice): "fuck you fuck you fuck you i will kill you i hate you trollz and i will fuck you up bitches. Imma get mah lawyer.."
Me: "You can't afford it bitch"
Jackie: (in her stupid 'Sam' voice): "Don't call here again" click.
I call back
Della: "Who in the tarnation is this?"
Me: "Is Jackie there?"
Della: "She's in the basement crying. Call back later"
Jackie will come back to twitter as Sam and the lindz again. She has to, what will she do with 23 hours of free time now? Get a job? HAHAHAHA!
First person to find the new Sam Cooper (it must be Jackie's) and shut it down gets a tee shirt. I'm thinking something like this:
You're welcome.
Later ya'll!
Then this happened (again) to my twitter account:
Dear Psycho, my password is the phrase you used to refer to your cunt (stinky_ pinky).
Sincerely, me.
Then this happened:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Sincerely,
Everyone on Twitter
Now "Sam" has stated on her dying blog that she has/will unleashed/unleash "the Lindz" and how everyone will be terrified. Unless she burps or farts in my presence, I am not terrified. I'm gonna double dog dare "the Lindz" to come at me bitch! I am delighted to see Jackie's meltdown. What a wack job! What ever will she do without her fake Sam Cooper? Who cares! Amirite?
So this was fun:
Me: #AlwaysWinning Jackie: #AlwaysAloser
How did I know she'd delete the posts? This:
Now that the pussy bitch deleted her posts, I decided to call "Sam" for an interview. It went a little something like this:
Me: "May I speak to Samuel Jacob Cooper please"
Jackie: "This is ka ka kelsey williams"
Me: "Hi Kelsey, this is Agent Orange from the publication 'Catfish weekly'. Do you mind if we ask you a few questions?"
Jackie: *burps loudly and yells for Della*
Me: "Jackie, I know its you. Stop with all these games. Just tell me why you pretend to Sam aka the homosexual"
Jackie: "He isn't a homo! He's a 44 married dad of identical twin boys heston and alex ceo of sjcinvestic 66 banjo playing vegan catholic avid reedor author of Almost Astarlia'd and Almost Human'd. I own gas statchions. And hotels. And 16 construction paper companies in the nebraskas and kansas and east dakota and iowa and a few 'M' states which i cunt remember rite now...."
Me: "Seriously Jackie, you fucked up. The 'He" and "I" thing again. Seriously, what the fuck?"
Jackie (in a deep fake southern accent): "Yeah, um, this here is Sam. Why are you poking the bear? The Lindz will hack you if you call here again."
Me: "Jackie, I actually gave you my password and you still can't hack me. Are you dyslexic or something?"
Jackie ( in her 'The lindz" voice): "fuck you fuck you fuck you i will kill you i hate you trollz and i will fuck you up bitches. Imma get mah lawyer.."
Me: "You can't afford it bitch"
Jackie: (in her stupid 'Sam' voice): "Don't call here again" click.
I call back
Della: "Who in the tarnation is this?"
Me: "Is Jackie there?"
Della: "She's in the basement crying. Call back later"
Jackie will come back to twitter as Sam and the lindz again. She has to, what will she do with 23 hours of free time now? Get a job? HAHAHAHA!
First person to find the new Sam Cooper (it must be Jackie's) and shut it down gets a tee shirt. I'm thinking something like this:
You're welcome.
Later ya'll!
No comments:
Post a Comment