Based on Jackie Overton's "Sam" post dated 12/5/2015
Hey everybody lol. It's Sam lol. And I have quite the Kendrandrum. See yesterday I went to orentation of the people who want to make adoption at the STATE OF ILLINOIS of which I attended and it was a hole hour. Imagine that. Orientation for potential adoptive parents. One hour only. So they issued me one of those numbers like what rich people get when they shop for lunch meat at the deli counter. It's a complex system that spits out tickets with numbers on them. I was issued number 505 which is Jackie Overton's current weight lol.
I went in their with a list of questions like:
how are babies made?
How long is it if I put my order in for 2 whiteys?
They must be twins.
They must be boys.
Non - J.E.W.S cuz Catholic
Anyhole their wuz only 4 people their. Mel Gibson, Madonna, Elvis and me. Since I am so much richer than them all combined, I think they'll call me first. I almost didn't go becauz Tom Cruize was asposed to be their but his spaceship never arrived so lol for that. I went home with a head full of information. Like how to make this meeting more believable for you, the reedor of my famous blog. And the way I do that is by telling you that anyone that says I'm a lair is infact, an untruth teller. Or simply put, a troll. On twitter. Where I live. At.
So my whore of a cousin got herself knocked up. By a man. With a penis. They are due in March. They are boy twins. Cuz twin girls must be eaten before they get dirty pillows. So my cousin, the whore, wants to give up the unborn babies. Since she ain't keeping them, I kind of want them. To add to my collection of stuff I really don't have like:
a guitar
a friend named Mark
any friends at all
any property
dreams, goals or aspirations
You know, the usual!
I'm gonna have to mediate or meditate or summthing like that about the question of weather or not to adopt her bastard boys. I think perhaps I should put a poll on the twitter about it so I will. lol. All the terrorist accounts that follow me (because I purchased followers with my $2.32 of income from my book on the Amazon) will all vote I'm sure! Speaking of Amazon, I have a helper their. His name is Eugene. See:
https://twitter.com/EugeneAmazon1 So for all u haters, suck on that! lol
So Maybe I don't want to adopt the boys (seriously Jackie, you dedicate half your idiot post to fake twins and the whore cousin and now you maybe don't want to??? Wackjob!) and maybe I may just purchase twin boys domestic or inter national. They get shipped in a fedex box. With holes so they don't asuffacate. I seriously didn't think I had this many choices! Anyhole, my whore couzin's daughter (did I miss something here? I can't keep up with all the imaginary people) talked to me about kinship adoption, yes it's a real wurd, google duh! She said that she needs to get on with her life and there's no room for bastard twin boys in the crack den of which is where she lives, with couzin. At a location unknown. Because when I invent people, I rarely give locations. I am geographically ignorant lol. So I'm gonna check with mamma dell to see if we can get a few crates for the twin boys and then on Monday I'll contact family law for bail and shit.
I NEED GOD TO HELP ME DECIDE. Pasgetti or hamburger bun? Witch is more better for infants?
Till next time, I am Sam. Vegan. Catholic. Single. Banjo player. Psychopath.
Photo credit is from a Twitter user (former victim of Jackie Overton). I sadly cannot remember the user but will credit source once I locate her (with her permission).
Hey everybody lol. It's Sam lol. And I have quite the Kendrandrum. See yesterday I went to orentation of the people who want to make adoption at the STATE OF ILLINOIS of which I attended and it was a hole hour. Imagine that. Orientation for potential adoptive parents. One hour only. So they issued me one of those numbers like what rich people get when they shop for lunch meat at the deli counter. It's a complex system that spits out tickets with numbers on them. I was issued number 505 which is Jackie Overton's current weight lol.
I went in their with a list of questions like:
how are babies made?
How long is it if I put my order in for 2 whiteys?
They must be twins.
They must be boys.
Non - J.E.W.S cuz Catholic
Anyhole their wuz only 4 people their. Mel Gibson, Madonna, Elvis and me. Since I am so much richer than them all combined, I think they'll call me first. I almost didn't go becauz Tom Cruize was asposed to be their but his spaceship never arrived so lol for that. I went home with a head full of information. Like how to make this meeting more believable for you, the reedor of my famous blog. And the way I do that is by telling you that anyone that says I'm a lair is infact, an untruth teller. Or simply put, a troll. On twitter. Where I live. At.
So my whore of a cousin got herself knocked up. By a man. With a penis. They are due in March. They are boy twins. Cuz twin girls must be eaten before they get dirty pillows. So my cousin, the whore, wants to give up the unborn babies. Since she ain't keeping them, I kind of want them. To add to my collection of stuff I really don't have like:
a guitar
a friend named Mark
any friends at all
any property
dreams, goals or aspirations
You know, the usual!
I'm gonna have to mediate or meditate or summthing like that about the question of weather or not to adopt her bastard boys. I think perhaps I should put a poll on the twitter about it so I will. lol. All the terrorist accounts that follow me (because I purchased followers with my $2.32 of income from my book on the Amazon) will all vote I'm sure! Speaking of Amazon, I have a helper their. His name is Eugene. See:
https://twitter.com/EugeneAmazon1 So for all u haters, suck on that! lol
So Maybe I don't want to adopt the boys (seriously Jackie, you dedicate half your idiot post to fake twins and the whore cousin and now you maybe don't want to??? Wackjob!) and maybe I may just purchase twin boys domestic or inter national. They get shipped in a fedex box. With holes so they don't asuffacate. I seriously didn't think I had this many choices! Anyhole, my whore couzin's daughter (did I miss something here? I can't keep up with all the imaginary people) talked to me about kinship adoption, yes it's a real wurd, google duh! She said that she needs to get on with her life and there's no room for bastard twin boys in the crack den of which is where she lives, with couzin. At a location unknown. Because when I invent people, I rarely give locations. I am geographically ignorant lol. So I'm gonna check with mamma dell to see if we can get a few crates for the twin boys and then on Monday I'll contact family law for bail and shit.
I NEED GOD TO HELP ME DECIDE. Pasgetti or hamburger bun? Witch is more better for infants?
Till next time, I am Sam. Vegan. Catholic. Single. Banjo player. Psychopath.
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